The second participant in the Great Résumé Makeover is a mid-level sales and marketing manager who is looking to work for a larger company.

"I felt that this individual had a résumé that was incomplete, particularly in listing quantifiable accomplishments." —Sally McIntosh
Before & After #2
The original résumé included information that was irrelevant to the candidate's job search, while neglecting to specify an internship during college that directly related to his career path and target position. Other information, like "ELF Software," lacked enough context to be meaningful. And none of the position descriptions had quantifiable accomplishments to distinguish him from his competition.

This was a shame, because, as you can see from the rewrite, his quantifiable accomplishments are outstanding. The new résumé is targeted right from the beginning to Sales, Marketing, and Business Development. Adding specifics (like a listing of the industries in which he has worked) and improving the format make it easier to read.
The nips, tucks, and knock-it-offs
•Select a format, normally chronological instead of functional. Provide a brief job description of about five lines and then a listing of no more than five quantifiable accomplishments.

•The company name, city, state, job title, and dates of employment are all necessary information for each position.

•Make sure that everything you write is concise and clearly explained.

•Write the Résumé in the first person singular. Eliminate pronouns. The "I" is taken for granted.

•First impressions are lasting. Use a clean format and make sure that the résumé is error-free. Use your spelling and grammar checker but remember they don't guarantee accuracy: If you typed in "Teas" instead of "Texas" the spell checker is not going to catch it because "teas" is a word. Read and reread the document for errors.
This Week's Makeover Pro:



Sally McIntosh
Sponsored by:


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About Sally McIntosh
Sally McIntosh has more than 18 years' experience in the résumé writing field and is a Nationally Certified Résumé Writer (NCRW), Certified Job and Career Transition Coach (JCTC), and a Certified Professional Résumé Writer (CPRW). Sally was selected to serve as Certification Chair of the National Résumé Writers' Association. Her business, Advantage Résumés, has been a pioneer in long-distance résumé services with an Internet presence for over 12 years. Several of her résumés have been selected for inclusion in published job-seeking guides, from books to the AOL Business Strategies Forum.