How to Write a Love Letter

How to write a love letter

“What is the etiquette for writing a love letter?”

 As an Etiquette Consultant, I get asked all sorts of odd questions, as people want to know the “right way” to do a wide variety of life’s activities. While this was not the typical “Which fork do I use?” type of question, it is a fun one to consider!

In my opinion, there are not hard and fast rules for something so personal, other than perhaps to follow the standard format of a letter, but if you are stumped about how to expose your heart, here are some ideas for you.

Start with the salutation and get creative!

Dear “Love of my life” (or, just their name would work too)

Make the body of the letter chatty and informative. Where are you? What did you do today? Make it personal to who you are! I met my husband at a graduation dinner. Then he flew back to the west coast, while I was in the mid west. This was not a good situation for a date, so we had to get to know each other through letters. Cell phone plans did not exist, and phone bills were outrageous! I had email, but the computer world had not yet entered his bachelor pad. He is a classic car guy and loves to draw. So in each of his letters was a detailed drawing of various vehicles.

The body of the love letter can be great sweeping declarations of undying love or a simple “I miss you.” For me, I wanted to hear every detail of what this guy did in order to figure out if I liked him or not. We had great fun writing cards and letters to each other. I always keep a stash of note cards, personalized stationery and stationery notes to send. I loved going to my mail box to see if I had received a letter that day.

The hardest part of the love letter is the closing. Do you write “Love,” “Sincerely,” “Fondly,” or “Your Friend?” This is the part I agonized over the most. I kept asking myself, “Where are we in this relationship?” For our letters, they progressed from “Sincerely” to “Your Friend” to “Love”. The pressure to say just the perfect thing can be monumental. Take stock of where you are and follow your heart!

Finally the only other important part of the love letter is the envelope and the address. Make sure the name and address are clear and correct. Be creative! Add some decoration, personalize it with a fun stamp or more drawings! The return address must also be clear, otherwise you will be waiting endlessly for that reply to your heartfelt declaration and gutsy move of saying “Love.” You will go crazy trying to figure out why he/she did not respond, so make sure your address is right.

You can’t go wrong in what you write in your letter. The real fun is that you send one. Step away from your computer, find some fun stationery and send a hand written love letter!

Cricket Wantland is a graduate of The Protocol School of Washington and is a Certified Consultant of Corporate Etiquette, International Protocol and Children’s Etiquette. She lives in Southern California and offers classes and training to all ages. Follow her on Facebook, Twitter or check out her website at

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One Comment

  1. Susan Martin
    Posted September 1, 2011 at 7:32 pm | Permalink

    Personally I don’t think etiquette plays a big part when writing a love letter. Maybe early on in a relationship when the waters are being tested; but when passion takes over don’t you just burn the book? We’d just LOVE to hear some of your “love stories.”

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